Wednesday 21 March 2018

How to Procrastinate from Plotting

Aiya!

Yes, you read that title right. I have been procrastinating from plotting for Camp NaNoWriMo. Why? No clue. But today I plan to try my absolute hardest at helping you procrastinate like a professional during this time that you should prooooobably plotting for Camp.

You are probably feeling pretty overwhelmed by this insanely crazy task, but I promise you, I can teach you how to procrastinate with a few simple steps and tricks. Thank me later. For now I must write this post for you!


As I have said, there are a few simple steps to being able to master this brilliant technique, and I will list them here for you…complete with instructions. Well, enough rambling from me…Onward to the Six Steps to Procrastination.

1. Starting Another WIP.

Yep. I know. Pretty insane huh? But trust me, it is doable.
Imagine this: When you sit down to do that plotting you’ve been meaning to finish off, you just happen to see that document with only 2000 precious words on it, sitting there, so lonely. So, you go over and write on it. Little by little, that tiny document has…Uh…8000 words. *coughs awkwardly* ANYWAYS. This is an ideal way to put off doing that scheduled in plotting.

*drops in a snippet*

***

“Hi Leo.” I sucked in a shuddering breath and craned my neck to look up at him as his eyebrows shot into his bleach white hair.

“Who mugged you and left you to die?” I grimaced at his slightly narrowed eyes and he dropped the book that rested loosely in his hand down on a small table and waved me inside.

I rubbed a hand over my neck. “Random bus driver.” I let my school books fall next to the novel. “According to Ethan, I was hit by a bus.”

Leo turned to stare at me again, his eyes trailing up and down my body. After a few moments he nodded and started walking away toward the kitchen, “That’s basically what it looks like. Minus the whole side-effect of being dead.”

I staggered after him into the room, and dimly noticed that is was lit only by the thin bit of light that trickled through the blinds above the perfectly clean and gleaming sink. Ignoring me, he stooped down to pull a small pot out of a cupboard, then poured milk into it—setting it down on the gas-top stove. I rolled my stiff shoulders slightly and stumbled towards a couch.

“If you get blood on my furniture…not even being immortal is going to save you.” My limbs stiffened Leo’s words and I straightened slowly, every muscle protesting at the movement.

“Sure thing.” I replied, my voice thick, and leant my good shoulder against the wall. “I’d never get blood on your stuff.” Some friend you are. 

Leo snorted slightly as he dropped half a block of dark chocolate into the pot. “Yeah right.”

***

2. Creating a Playlist for New WIP

One rule for this: It has to be epic. So, you can’t just toss in a few songs that you think are good, you need to go all out and put in only the best. You need to listen to at least 4 hours worth of music to find the ones that suit your distracting WIP the best. Then you need to order them so that they will flow on from one another.

Trust me. This will take up a lot of time, and then you can have a cool soundtrack while you are doing all of these other forms of procrastination. *nods wisely* This is very important.

3. Creating Character Collages for New WIP. 

Yup. Collages are procrastination’s best friend. Such a close friend that even random people on the bus seem to recognise it when you’re sitting there, happily making collages of these awesome characters. And it is so much fuuuuun. You end up with a pile of pretty collages at the end to look at and feel all of them happy feels about for your precious characters. *hugs all of the character collages*


4. School Work…Writing Ideally

If you are a sensible writer, and happen to be in year 11 or 12 at school, you almost certainly have one or two writing projects to be doing.

Do them.

Then you can use the excuse when Camp NaNo comes around that you were frantically doing school work, even if in reality you were just writing 8 different short stories and then choosing between them as to which one to submit as your final task. So there you go!

5. Repeat 2 & 3 but for Your Actual WIP for Camp

Time to make more playlists and aesthetic collages, but this time for your actual WIP that you’re meant to be plotting! This is pretty close to actually doing your WIP, so, this may help ease you of that guilty concious thing that comes from deliberately avoiding something you planned to have done.

6. Master the Perfect Chai Recipe 

You heard me. You are going to become the best at making chai tea. By the end of March, you should have worked out the exact amount of each spice you need to add the the Twinings tea to make it absolutely spectacular. You may even find that you have spent an hour of your Saturday carefully measuring out spices and taking notes.

Let me encourage you in this…You will succeed. It may take 48 hours of your life, but if you keep persistingnot only have you successfully procrastinatedbut you have also made the best chai you will ever have.



Well, that’s all I’ve got to say on the art of procrastination, and I shall now leave you with your prompt and be on my way.


Anyone else hyped for Camp? Do you have any favorite forms of procrastination? And do you have any tips for getting that cup of chai just right? Tell me!

2 comments:

  1. Well that picture you used in the prompt is making me think of Ben but I'M NOT WRITING HIS STORY. HELP NO. DON'T MAKE ME THINK OF THAT. *flees from the story inspirations*

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    Replies
    1. NO JAAAANE! Don't run away! Ben needs you to write his story!

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